In the past I have been walked over, made fun of, taken advantage of.
I've lost friends that were dear to me, and I've made friends that I could care less for.
I'm set in my own ways and have no intention to change them for anyone.
I've learned that unless I know exactly what I want, what I believe, how I am, or WHO I am, there will always be those people who will tell you that what you have in front of you is the best you'll ever get. I used to believe it. But I don't anymore, because I'm stubborn. I don't believe something is the best for me just because someone says so. I believe it when I actually feel it's true down to my core. When I can't even imagine my life with anything else.
I may be stubborn, hard headed, set in my ways, and extremely aggravating to some people, but I would rather be that, that be the girl that everyone gets, everyone understands, and everyone agrees with everything I do.
I'm more of the girl who will gladly wait until what I believe I deserve, not the girl who will try every bad seed before the right one finally comes along. I get feelings, my gut reaction, a woman's sixth sense if you will, and I choose not to ignore it.
I'm a very passionate person, about anything that's important to me in life. And when I don't get that feelings inside me of jumping for joy, the moment when I can't get the smile off my face no matter how hard I try, it's not going to happen.
I would rather not give pout every last little bit of my heart to the wrong person, when I can sit here, wit the little bit of my heart that I actually have left, that's not hurt or broken or betrayed, and wait until I know for sure, then give him my whole heart, knowing he won't take it and be the one to break it.
Basically, I know me better than you do. So do me a favor, and don't go around telling me what to do with my life, just because it works for you. We both already know that what's best for me isn't best for you, and vice versa. I know what's best for me, because I'm the only one who knows exactly what has gone on in my past to make me the way I am. I've changed because of it, and I know exactly the kind of guy that I will end up with. &I hate to break it to you, but you can't just expect me to fall into a relationship, especially just because it would be convenient for you. You can keep going on double dates, I'll stay at home and be a homebody; I've mastered the art very well. I'm just as happy going out with friends, going on dates with a group of people, as I am staying at home with a book, or just hanging out with a friend and chilling, making new friends, trying things I've never done.
My comfort zone is extremely broad, but being thrown into a relationship that I don't want to be a part of, just won't fly. It never has before, and it's not starting anytime soon.
I'm the kind of girl that 'plays hard to get.' Again with the stubbornness! Most people say that it's bad that I do this, but I say that it's the only way to weed out the people in my life who are just kind of there and the ones who actually want to be there. I've been betrayed by so many people, it's a habit to make people prove to me that they want to be in my life, other than just by default.
I feel like a guy needs to chase me. He needs to prove to me that he wants me for me. Yes, I play hard to get, but I don't go so far as to coming across as a lost cause. Confused? Good. I'm doing my job.
"You have pointed out my flaws again, as if I don't already see them."
I know what's wrong with me, so please don't go out of your way to point it out. I laugh at my flaws, because life would suck if I couldn't laugh at things like that.
I'm a confusing person, and there's 'more than meets the eye' with me. Cliche, but it's true.
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