LIVE.LAUGH.
LOVE.LIFE.


"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

What's your biggest fear?
Some people would say things like death, spiders, clowns, or something along those lines. My biggest fear, is being forgotten by those that I will never forget.
I fear that once this part of my life comes to an end and all of my friends all go their separate ways, I fear that they won't remember me. We all say to the people closest to us that we will never forget each other. That we will always remember the time when...
But who's to say that once we're all away from each other, that those promises won't fall to the back of our minds?
There are so many fears that I have, but I have learned that there is no life unless you learn to live despite those fears. But there is one thing that I fear, and can't help but think about every day; that the people that I can't imagine my life without, will one day carry on with their lives as if I was never there.
So I have made a decision. I came to this conclusion earlier this year, and plan to stick to it wholeheartedly. From here on out, I will be the best person I can be, and there won't be anything that can cause me to waiver from that.
I spend my days laughing and making stupid jokes. To me, there is no greater satisfaction than making people happy. I know that there are a lot of things that I do that are way beyond some of my friends comfort zones, but if they can look at me and laugh with me when I make a complete fool of myself, then I'm a happy person. I have learned that the one way to make myself feel good, and to be comfortable in my own skin, is to make my friends and family laugh. To me, there is nothing better than the sound of laughter.
I know that someday all of the memories I'm making now will slowly fade, and people will eventually forget. But as the quote above says, people will forget what I say. They will forget all of the things that I say to cheer up their days, all the stupid things I say to make their days better. They will all forget the stupid things that I've done, and that I will do. I will always be stupid because I love it; it makes me happy, but someday, my dearest friends will forget all of the things that I do to make them laugh. BUT, I believe that no matter what, when they're looking back at pictures or yearbooks &they see my picture, they will always be able to say, "I remember when..." I hope that 50 years down the road when people think of me, there will be that small smile that can't help but make its way onto their faces. I hope the things I do now to make people laugh, and what I do to make fun of myself will always stick with them. I believe that words are easily forgotten, and memories fade, but feelings are eternal. There are some things that just never leave us. I want to be the person that people remember and think, "Lydia... that girl sure was crazy, but she never failed to make me smile." I want to be the one that will cross their minds occasionally. I don't want to be the one that they think about every second of every day, no. I want to be the memory that only comes once in a blue moon, but one that they will always remember.
I fear that one day, my friends will forget me, I just hope that they never forget how I make them feel, good and bad. I don't want to be remembered for just the good, because that's nothing to be remembered by. I want people to think of me and know that even on my hardest days, I still did everything I could to smile.
I know that I will one day forget the people that are in my life now, but I wish to always be able to remember them at one point or another. I don't want to be a start that is constantly shining in someone's memory. I want to be that one meteor that crosses their mind once a year, but gives them something to laugh &smile about for a day. I want to, eternally, be the one that can make people happy.
A smile is the strongest thing in the world. It can change a day, an outlook, or even a life. So why keep yours hidden? I plan on sharing mine with the world for a lifetime &beyond. What will you do with yours?